Mercy
Member since: 2007Hey guys.
This is a non-Star Wars request, but it came through the site so I figure I'll set the blog up here.
He's a Monk for a D&D game.
Here's the description:
Name: Sasame Hiroki (SAH-sah-may he-ROW-key)
Race: Human
Gender: Male
If you were to wake in the middle of the night, you would find Sasame training, no matter the hour. By the hazy light of the moon you would see him practice each footstep... each thrust... each moment with equal care. He trains as though he is in the middle of a fierce battle with multiple opponents. The reflection of moonlight off his polished breastplate provides just enough illumination to see he remains in the same equipment he wears throughout the day. The maroon of his outfit provides a haunting contrast to the glinting steel that surrounds his most vital areas. His face is masked below the eyes and his short black hair remains matted with the sweat of his day's effort. Spanning his shoulder line sit the hilt of six swords, three on either side of his head. At his waist are two more swords attached to his darkened leather belt. Only one thing is more intimidating than the appearance of this martial master appearing as though he's equipped to fight an army: through this overwhelming scene, the ferocity of the battle, the strain of the constant training... Sasame remains absolutely calm. There is no emotion in his eyes, no passion ruling his reason... he is the eye of the storm, the center of an otherwise chaotic world. He has become one with the blades he wields and the blades have become extensions of his own being.
Comments
So here's the first couple of sketches. I think I like the feel of the second one, as it's meant to be in more of a Manga style. The figure is simpler, blockier, and also has more sense of inner serenity to him.
Oh - one question Tan-Par. Is your monk based on the Shaolin style or are you looking for a more samurai thing, cause your description sounds a lot more samurai than anything else...
Let me know what you think.
Wow, the feel of the second one is awesome. He's more monk than samurai... swordsmanship is his life, his religion, his everything.
From the character description I would go with your second sketch. He looks like he could pounce at any moment even though he is standing straight and still. The only critique I would have on the figure is on the positioning of his feet, specifically where each of his heels would be against the floor (it looks like the back leg is shorter than the front). All in all I like the style and the concept. Can't wait to see how it turns out!
I agree, I like the feel of the second version. He looks trained and focused there. I can't wait to see the colored version!
He totally reminds me of Edge, from Final Fantasy IV. Which is generally a good thing.
Yeah, the back foot is meant to be further, ah, back. Hopefully, with shading, this will be more solid and seem less like he's got one leg too short.
I didn't want to have his feet too close together as it would belie the readiness of his character. Or some such. Of course, if it doesn't work out I can always change it...
Cheers for the feedback, all. I was a bit reticent about posting this one as it isn't Star Wars, but I'm glad I did now.
~ Mercy.
Yeah, glad I could start the flood (drizzle?) of off-topic art. Eclipse never checks this site anymore so he'll never know. :P Oh, and Edge did kick some serious tail so kudos for that link up.
Mark, I've commented on your blog!... I'm the person who told you to post it there... don't give me this crap.
Looks good Mercy, I think the colors will make this one more solid. If I can critique (uh oh, here comes my martial arts stuff) I'd say the following:
Since we're focussed on the 2nd one I'll critique the first later, but I think the feet actually look good, at least where the bottom of them is positioned, I think the back foot looks odd because it's way taller than it should be. Smooth that down to be a little more... foot-like and I think it'll take care of itself. Also, if you could give the knees just the slightest bend this would improve the character's relaxed-but-ready stance. Also, I think (and this is just a perspective thing) that the sword is a little too "turned toward the viewer". I think it should be angled away a little, and the important part of that is that I think the handle looks good and the blade looks just a little off.
All in all though, very good.
As for the first pic, I actually like this one better (personally) because I think it shows the martial prowess of the character (he actually has some bite, not just bark/aura).
With that said:
Your right hand is FANTASTIC. Spot on, however, the right elbow needs to be pulled in a little more. The martial artist's objective is almost always to limit his area that he needs to protect. I'm not going to get into the details, but suffice it to say, the right arm is REALLY close, but needs to be just a little closer to the body, especially the upper arm. He'll have more leverage that way.
Your feet are almost correct. The right foot needs to be twisted out just a little more (90 degrees from the other foot). Your right foot is flat it needs to be on the ball of the foot, your left foot is on the ball, it needs to be flat.
And last but certainly not least, he's holding his knife backwards. Blade should be twisted so that it faces away from his fore-arm, and the hand can (and probably should) be cocked so that the back of the blade runs parallel with the forearm.
I don't know if you did this one purpose, but your left hands position (right next to the hip) is again totally spot on, so kudos there. Alternately it COULD be protecting the chest.
Sorry for the nit-picky martial arts stuff... I know... I'm a nerd.
Eclipse
Hey Eclipse - You know, I was totally hoping you'd take a look at these for me!
I agree that the stance of the first pic is more enjoyable but there are parts of it I am not happy with either. I redrew that right hand/arm about five times and I still think it needs redoing. Great spotting on the knife blade being toward the forearm - missed that completely! I do like the second picture, or the style of it, but I worry that it is leaning towards that 'dark and brooding, but I'm totally powerful, no really...' sort of mentality that we see all too often in these sort of characters. I don't know. I had a really crap day at work today and I'm feeling grumpy...
Anyway - I looked up 'Edge' as I have only started playing FF at about VIII. I like him! Cheers guys!
And Eclipse - all the best people are geeks of some kind. I say revel in the geekdom! Yar!
So here's the second one in ink. I'll colour it up next.
Any preferences for tone Tan-Par? Night scene? Shadows and grays? Sepia? Or shall I just have a play with it and get back to you?
P.S. Changed the back foot on the pic a bit.
Play with it and find what is best for you... You've already exceeded my expectations.
Looking good!
-LC
Okay, so I've finally got the first colour version up. This is with shading but no background yet. Thoughts?
Background up. Too misty?
I like the background a lot, it sets the mood and doesn't distract from the character. Great job all around!
I like it, it's exactly how I wrote it... even down to the subtle colors. :)
You rock :)
Wicked!
I'll post it to gallery, but do you want a email with the jpeg? Just PM me your address and I'll send it to you.
I'm really glad you like it.
~ Mercy.